Sierra in the Mountains

// becoming

You can never go back to the person you were before. Everything you’ve been through, everything you’ve seen, and everything you’ve experienced is a part of you now. But you know what? You get to choose how you let your past shape your future. You can let your past harden you and keep you bitter, or you can let your past go and allow it to be the stepping stone into your future. It’s all up to you.

- Walk the Earth

I may be extremely late to posting this, but I wanted to share a little about Sierra. I’ve been watching her journeys all over the world through her social media page for the past year and a half or so since we did this shoot (June 2021), and I have watched her grow into her art and passions, and I am so incredibly proud to know her.

This is actually the second shoot she and I had an an opportunity to do together, and I’ll post the other someday likely, too. But for now, I hope you enjoy the spirit, the energy, the gentle power of this incredible woman seen through these photos.

Sierra, I’m loving seeing your grow. I look forward to the next time our paths cross.

Courtney + vintage bathtub

“Remember what you must do
when they undervalue you,
when they think
your softness is your weakness,
when they treat your kindness
like it is their advantage.

You awaken
every dragon,
every wolf,
every monster
that sleeps inside you
and you remind them
what hell looks like
when it wears the skin
of a gentle human.”

— Nikita Gill

Most often boudoir shoots are designed for a significant other. This is truly a lovely idea, and it is a really fun shoot to work with a woman wanting to do something lovely and cute for her lover. But I will say, that the strength of a woman simply stepping into her own skin for herself can be massively empowering. As the photographer to be a part of the process this almost like a transformation, but of really of seeing a woman come into her own standing has to be one of the most amazing things. As has been often stated:

“Here’s to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them.”

— Unknown

Thank you, Courtney, for being willing to do such a wonderful shoot in such an amazing bathtub/bathroom. Here's to your beautiful and courageous heart. You are stunning as a person in all ways. It was truly fun and amazing to do this with you! See below for some of my favorites.

Beth at sunset

“The broken girls are the flowers of the earth. They grow through tough conditions, they bloom for themselves.”

— R. H. Sin

The quote above was shared with me by Beth, and of course, it is marvelously perfect! I'm loving this quote so much, too, as I, myself navigate the changes in life, and follow the consistent changes. It seems nature herself in her changes and blooming remains such an incredible constant. Change itself is what is the same. So let us each beautifully bloom. And so we shall, and so we must.

Beth was so amazing this evening! I loved working with her! She very willingly climbed in among the branches on this lovely evening. I'm so happy to have met her and get to share some loveliness with you! I'm sure you'll see more from our adventures among the plants!

Cameos, flowers, and pets with Amanda

“Happiness radiates like the fragrance from a flower and draws all good things towards you.”

— Maharishi Mahesh Yogi

I have a lovely idea for a lovely photos series, and Amanda was willing to be my first participant! We put beautiful pink waxflowers in her hair and shot some photos using enhanced natural light The theme is meant to mimic a vintage cameo, and in so doing, celebrate a combination of flowers and the woman wearing them.

Amanda is a wonderful person who is updating her lifestyle to a more minimalist fashion. She love her pets and is a wonderful person in her own being and nature! I'm so happy to call you a friend, Amanda!

I looked up meaning on waxflowers and found that they are often associated with riches and enduring wealth. The long lasting blooms make them a symbol for lasting success. The waxflower may also be used as a sign of lasting love or patience. I also found that they have been associated with Happiness in Marriage. So here's to enduring wealth, happiness, success, love, and happiness!

Thank you for doing these with me, Amanda! (Last two photos are for fun of Amanda with her pets!)

Dani of Milkweed Herbarium

I met Dani through both of us working in various ways within the Natural Industry and came to find that she was not only a wonderfully sweet person, but she also was the owner/teacher of Milkweed Herbarium. I absolutely loves herbs myself, and so I was absolutely delighted to work with Dani on a lovely photo shoot all about her and herbs and some milkweed thrown in of course! If you have any desire to learn more about herbs, I highly recommend checking out her classes, as she was a complete delight to work with in our photo shoot! I can't wait to see you again, Dani!

on the feeling of emptiness

Maybe. Just maybe. This great emptying of yourself....this forcing of you to come to terms with all the weight you’ve been carrying....is much much bigger than you think. You’ve been carrying everything you need not carry for so long that you haven’t left room for your soul.

So this great painful emptying is as it should be. Just the emptying process of everything you don’t need.

You have your dreams but you haven’t left room. So you must be emptied if you want your dreams to come true.

They say you cannot pour from an empty cup. And neither can you pour your dreams from a cup so full of carrying everything it need not carry.

Can you bear the emptiness long enough to heal....to fill again with your dreams?

Oh I know it hurts. Like having your bones exposed. But you need not keep covering with the scraps you’ve had. Build your dreams. It’s cold out. But from what cup do you want to pour? Your dreams? Your loves? Or the same rhythms you’ve been doing that haven’t satisfied?

Maybe. Just maybe. The universe IS standing with you. Believe it.

Feel those fears. Feel that pain. Feel the anger of the road that lead to your emptying. Feel it. Know it. Walk it. Stop resisting it. And let it too, empty from you. You need not carry all of this. You really need not carry it.

Are the expectations of unkind people really how you want your cup filled? This is a new path. Let it be new. And dare to believe that this great emptying is so that you may indeed be filled again....so that you might truly pour out the good and kindness and beauty that hasn’t had quite as much room as it had before.

Be empty for a moment. Heal those deep scars that have been covered so long. Heal. Restore. And let your dreams actually come true.

- Amber Lianne, November 2, 2017

a love like Carl and Ellie

Have you ever seen the movie, "Up"? When I asked Joey and Mitchie what some of their favorite quotes were, I was told how much they both admired the love of Carl and Ellie from the movie Up. And honestly, after getting the chance to know them even better, I can definitely say that that love fits these two so well. I met Mitchie over a year ago, and as both of our jobs were changing, we were able to stay in contact through social media. I had the incredible privilege of doing photos of the two of them a little over a week ago. I kept thinking as they told me about them and I got to see them interact that their love was one that was such an incredibly beautiful story. 

To quote Mitchie directly: "For one Christmas, Joey painted me a world map with their chairs and on the back he wrote, 'Wherever it may be, my Paradise Falls is wherever you are.' "

This is love. This is one of the beautiful ways that love looks. Their love makes my heart glow. Thank you for sharing your beautiful story with me, Joey and Mitchie! (Oh, and for the record, thank you to everyone who helped me choose these final images! I was having an impossible time deciding!)

who she is

If you haven't checked out the first part of my shoot with Sarah, please check it out here first for some context to this second part.

I think the best place to start with the story behind this shoot is with the song that Sarah is really connecting to for this, and that is "Girl on Fire" by Alicia Keys. Because truly, this is about Sarah being who she is in this time, on the other side of loss. The way she lights up a room and brings her full presence to every place she enters. This is about who she is on the other side of an unexpected loss and how she continues to move through everything in her life... through every roll, from that of a mother to an employee, to the very soul of who she is and what brings her to light on fire. Sarah, you go, girl. Way to bring your passion to the table and make your goals continue to grow even as you explore all ways of who you are as you are. This is Sarah on fire in her life, and I'm so glad to be a part of the adventure!

when things fall apart

About a week before Sarah came to visit me, I sent her a text that started with something like, "so... don't hate me... but I have an idea." Sarah's husband left her about a year and a half ago, and so the story of this shoot has a lot to do with that reality. I've watched Sarah grow and move through the pain of the leaving and the divorce into an even better friend and a more stunning woman of heart and soul than I knew of her before. They say trials brings out who you really are, and as such, it is my privilege to call Sarah my friend. This shoot is about moving through the process of releasing dreams and hopes and stepping out of what was, even allowing it to fall away. Sarah played the song "Burning House" by Cam a few times that day and it seemed to fall in line with everything. Sometimes you have to let what was burn and wash away so that you can become new. Like a phoenix from the ashes, Sarah is still Sarah, but more of her than she was before. Sometimes you start anew. Sometimes you find life on the other side and even through pain. It's not as though what was no longer exists, it's just in a different state of existence and you yourself have become more of who you are through it, and I see this so much as a part of Sarah's beautiful soul. Sarah, thank you for being so willing to work through all this with me. I'm truly so grateful for you and the woman you are and how you have come even more into yourself through this. 

rhythms

You know those times when you tell yourself and others a truth over and over again....and you think you get it yourself but suddenly it really hits home?

How many times have I said that it's not about the arrival but about the journey....the rhythm. Somehow awoke feeling discouraged again about many things. Got my butt out the door for a morning trail run. And it was rough going at first. Feeling every hill to be bigger than it was.

And that's just it. Finally on the way back when it was just a minuscule easier than on the way out, it finally struck me.

Life really is about the rhythm. It is about somehow finding our soul's best path, best balance in what we can do for others and ourselves. That rhythm is life. And frankly sometimes just moving in that rhythm is so difficult.

Sometimes the run is easy. Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it feels almost impossible. Sometimes your best rhythm is tears and hiding under covers. Sometimes it's your soul bursting into all the crevices of an empty mountain.

It is all rhythm. It is all about balance. And let yourself move in rhythm. Sometimes telling yourself how to when you can't figure out how.

Loss comes. Rebirth comes. Rhythm is yours through all of it. And somehow timing--in this construct by which we manufacture out lives--ends up being what you need

To all in the midst of loss or rebirth today.....may you find rest and movement as needed in your soul's natural rhythm.

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Shot with my Canon 5D at Pismo Beach, CA on the evening of 13 March 2017

the love of a mother

I had the wonderful privilege of taking photos of Miss Cassandra TeLae and her beautiful boys earlier this year in March while I still lived in Minnesota. This March day greeted us with lovely sunshine and warmer than usual temperatures. Cassandra also happens to be a dear friend, for whom I am so grateful. She shines so brightly in all that she does. She is a wonderful mother, and incredible encouragement and loving person to so many. You and your boys are amazing people, Cassandra, and I am so grateful to know you!

“There is no greater heaven the heart of a loving mother” 
― Bangambiki Habyarimana, The Great Pearl of Wisdom

little family happiness

Today I dream of little families and happiness on tiny faces in the Minnesotan springtime sunlight. My brother, sister-in-law, and nephew from this last March.

Tal & Neela's wedding

I'm so excited to show you picture's from Tal and Neela's wedding! Their wedding was on the 19th of July in a gorgeous garden on a simply amazing Minnesotan summer afternoon and evening. I was so excited to photograph their wedding! They put the most beautiful details and organic pieces into their wedding! Their wedding had the most incredible elements of love and family and friendship crafted into every corner. And the garden setting! Wow! I honestly do not know if I have ever seen a more beautiful backyard garden... so perfect for a weddings setting!

These two carry about their presence such an ease of love and affection. It is a delight to simply be with them, and I am was honored to photograph their wedding!

Enjoy their lovely photos below! I hope you can feel the love I felt in simply being there to be a part of everything. Here are my favorites and some highlights from the wedding!

the darling Maggie Mae

Back in December last year, Maggie Mae and I found a small studio and shot some new headshots for her. We were trying for a few different looks, and had so much fun in the studio! She is seriously such an sweet and fun and amazing woman! You should definitely check out her website here! She is an amazing woman and I am privileged to know her! Maggie, I can't wait to see where you go!

Hope, California, October 2013

This may be one of the longest blog posts I have had yet! This was certainly one of my favorite photos shoots I have done! So many incredible photos that it makes it really hard to choose. And I actually did not post all of the shots we took!

Hope is amazing. She has been staying with her family out in California. This past October when I was out West, we coordinated a time when we were both free, and went and played all afternoon by AND IN the ocean!

Seriously, SO MUCH FUN! There are lots of pictures below, but enjoy! I love doing these types of shoots where we plan out some ideas of things we intend to do beforehand!

Ah sigh... That western sunset and rocky shores of the west coast. I took a couple scenic photos... thought later that I maybe should have taken more... but that's okay! Some beauty is remembered best in the mind. Enjoy!

Do you see my shadow???? haha! 

Laura, After the Storm

Last summer, on 21 June, Minneapolis and the surround area saw a massive storm. Trees were downed, and parts of the city completely lost power for days. It took weeks to get the trees cleaned up and removed because so many massive trees fell down.

For a while previous, I had been thinking how much fun it would be to do photos in the middle of the pouring rain. My neighbor in my current apartment building (who was also a friend previous to when we had moved into the apartment as neighbors) thought this was a fabulous idea. 

While the rain and wind pounded against our windows and we kept asking one another if we were brave enough to go out and do this in this storm, we planned out the outfit and what we would do.

We left to go get waterproof mascara... I am laughing at this right now, thinking about that crazy night... Laura driving. The rain was coming down so hard that had we not been wearing raincoats, we would have been instantly soaked. Our first stop for mascara proved unsuccessful, as we found that a majority of Minneapolis had completely lost power, due probably to the downed trees we dodged. (Not kidding! Thankfully, no trees in the motion of falling!) We found a store with power, bought mascara...

And then, true to the style of a Midwest storm, the storm stopped. Almost instantly. But everything was soaked, and the gutters were pouring with water. The air was so wet it almost felt like it was still raining at times. So we went to one of our favorite little streets in Minneapolis... a place we like to say is our "little bit of Europe in Minneapolis." I am sure you know the place if you have been there. ;)

This shoot was so much fun! I love that my friends are willing to be a part of my sometimes crazy ideas. ;)

Self Portraits, 10 August 2013

In August this last year, I went to bed early on a Friday night and got up early the next morning to catch one of my favorite types of light... morning light. Doing self portraits are also a great way to teach oneself, as we tend to be hyper-critical of what we like or don't like about ourselves.

These were not my first self portraits I had ever taken, but it had been quite a while since I had last taken planned out self portraits. It was a lot of fun, and it felt like I was taking what I wanted in life and actualizing it. Perhaps that is a strange way to put it. But for now, here's some photos of me from this last summer. At the very least, perhaps the summertime warmth brings a sigh of relief to you as it does to me. 

What are your first steps toward the things you want in life?It starts with you!